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Real introduction
#1
Hi so i guess its time for me to make a ''real'' Introduction aswell.

well my name is kevin and im 14 years old, im born and raised in Denmark. Ive always been bullied as long back as i can remeber, i struggle with alot of difficulties, and when i was 10 years old i lost my little brother to lung cancer, not too long ago my mom was fighting it aswell, she got through it tho, but its still caused so much depression to me, if you guys see me in a bad mood sometimes then its because im depressed, and you gotta ignore me please. Back when i got bullied i tried to kill myself, which left quite a big scar on my life, i regreat everything that ive done.
Then i realised if i cant make that many friends irl, hmm what about online, thats when i started playing ps3, i got some friends on there who kept me going and made me laugh, one of them actually ended up taking his own life, which killed me inside, then i started playing ps4 and pc at the same time, while i was getting more and more popular in a community on the ps4, i got more and more known on the pc community Agarp aswell and that was a huge life change for me tbh, ive met the most amazing people on there, so thanks!
[Image: WlAw2Ag.png]
RIP Xilli <3 i'll always love you!
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#2
You are so strong, a role model for eveyone in struggle. I wish the best of luck for you friend Heart
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[Image: Bn0C7b5.png?1]
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#3
(05-12-2016, 06:29 PM)Craw Wrote: You are so strong, a role model for eveyone in struggle. I wish the best of luck for you friend Heart

Thanks man idk what to say... o.o Heart
[Image: WlAw2Ag.png]
RIP Xilli <3 i'll always love you!
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#4
I'm honoured to be your friend & my pleasure to know you Kevin. Stay strong my friend. Heart

            "Experience has taught me that wishful thinking 
                                 only leads to disappointment."
                                                         
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#5
First off, I gotta say it takes some guts to write this down.
Secondly, when I saw you started using offensive language, I thought you were just being a real dick. But know I realise there's more behind it. I know it's not always possible to control your anger, but aiming your anger at other people can result in them feeling offended. And I hope that those people read this and see that they shouldn't take what you say serious.
And keep in mind:

Never give up.
"Do you want to fly with a dragon?"

"No, I want to be a dragon flying"
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#6
(05-12-2016, 06:55 PM)V1tal Wrote: Damn, shocking story :/

I was getting bullied either. Still in a depression. After the bullying i didn't trust people anymore, so i dont have any friends left.
I only have online friends. My parents dont agree with it. But i accepted it. I'm lonely in school. But i don't really care. I accept my life how it is. But sometimes i get really sad when i see others having fun with eachother. Like going to the swimming pool. Then i always think of myself. I don't do fun things. Thats what i think at that moment. But when i'm online, skyping with online friends i really have fun with them. Stay strong <3 Cool that i can share my story with someone who is depressed too.

Peace out..

-V1tal

It's great to see that people can say this here without being shouted at or something like that. I was never bullied but most of the people I know irl are the most disrespectfull s**t I've seen. I started disliking people, because I thought they all did this: annoying and no respect for others. But since I got on this forums, I've seen different. A GOOD difference. 
"Do you want to fly with a dragon?"

"No, I want to be a dragon flying"
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#7
(05-12-2016, 07:02 PM)ℱIRE Wrote:
(05-12-2016, 06:55 PM)V1tal Wrote: Damn, shocking story :/

I was getting bullied either. Still in a depression. After the bullying i didn't trust people anymore, so i dont have any friends left.
I only have online friends. My parents dont agree with it. But i accepted it. I'm lonely in school. But i don't really care. I accept my life how it is. But sometimes i get really sad when i see others having fun with eachother. Like going to the swimming pool. Then i always think of myself. I don't do fun things. Thats what i think at that moment. But when i'm online, skyping with online friends i really have fun with them. Stay strong <3 Cool that i can share my story with someone who is depressed too.

Peace out..

-V1tal

It's great to see that people can say this here without being shouted at or something like that. I was never bullied but most of the people I know irl are the most disrespectfull s**t I've seen. I started disliking people, because I thought they all did this: annoying and no respect for others. But since I got on this forums, I've seen different. A GOOD difference. 
Never expected to see people with a depression too on this forum, gives a good feeling that i'm not the only one here who feels bad.
Tired of living.
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#8
(05-12-2016, 07:37 PM)V1tal Wrote:
(05-12-2016, 07:02 PM)ℱIRE Wrote:
(05-12-2016, 06:55 PM)V1tal Wrote: Damn, shocking story :/

I was getting bullied either. Still in a depression. After the bullying i didn't trust people anymore, so i dont have any friends left.
I only have online friends. My parents dont agree with it. But i accepted it. I'm lonely in school. But i don't really care. I accept my life how it is. But sometimes i get really sad when i see others having fun with eachother. Like going to the swimming pool. Then i always think of myself. I don't do fun things. Thats what i think at that moment. But when i'm online, skyping with online friends i really have fun with them. Stay strong <3 Cool that i can share my story with someone who is depressed too.

Peace out..

-V1tal

It's great to see that people can say this here without being shouted at or something like that. I was never bullied but most of the people I know irl are the most disrespectfull s**t I've seen. I started disliking people, because I thought they all did this: annoying and no respect for others. But since I got on this forums, I've seen different. A GOOD difference. 
Never expected to see people with a depression too on this forum, gives a good feeling that i'm not the only one here who feels bad.
Trust me... You aren't the only one..  Still, stay positive bro... Smile
H I ,   I ' M   E D E N .
Aussie Boi. Music addict. Hopeless artistic.
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#9
First, let me say that this is so much more than an Introduction, and thanks for 'being brave' and sharing! Notice the others that immediately came out and shared stories... This is just one more. But I've been around longer, and have more to share. You started this, @HazR friend! Hold your head high.

** CODE BLACK: Long squirrel post dead-ahead **

(05-12-2016, 06:07 PM)HazR Wrote: Hi so i guess its time for me to make a ''real'' Introduction aswell.

We'll never find out how many.... because most come and find a place like this, and say to themselves, "Finally a place where I can 'fit in', among a whole bunch of normal people who have no clue".

Of course, 'what is normal', anyhow?! The "norm" in humanity, is uniqueness!

I can guarantee you one thing, if everyone who read and related similar stories, you'd probably be shocked.

I've had an amazing life so far, despite some challenges. I was a regular 'bully target' until my gr 9 year, in which I sprouted by 7 inches, and then suddenly bullies were asking me to consider joining the football (not soccer, hehe) team. HELL NO! Then it was mostly just stories told behind my back. I see that as having made me more open-minded, in a way, and gave me a sort of a"^%#$ you" independence/attitude.

When I was your age, my fave saying was "I loved math before I loved people, because math followed rules and made sense, and people didn't." (Of course, that went into the [email protected], when I was introduced to theoretical mathematics... ~snort~)

My new-found size helped me to intimidate without saying a word. I'd only do that, if you continually bothered me, and it was time to say, "You don't want a war with me, because I could surprise you."

But that gave me my freedom. To those who befriended me (mostly, ones who shared the same interests), I think we had good times, and learned a lot.

~squirrel gazes @ ground and mutters~
Sometimes, life truly does suck. And a disease as agile and persistent as cancer, that uses time to set up shop in a body while the host is none-the-wiser, is sadly the author of many of those. It hasn't happened to me yet. But I joined a friend's business, and he lost his mom to a long battle with cancer while a young teen. It's hard to be forced to grow up early. But you can make that work for you. It gives you a harsh perspective on what's important in life. But you can turn it into an opportunity, with enough stubbornness.

Sadly, words here are not going to do much, but I hope that your depression is not the "clinical" variety (which is hard to shake out of, being physical in nature), but rather the sort that you can confront, and say "hell no!" to.

(05-12-2016, 06:55 PM)V1tal Wrote: After the bullying i didn't trust people anymore, so i dont have any friends left.
I only have online friends. My parents dont agree with it. But i accepted it. I'm lonely in school. But i don't really care. I accept my life how it is. But sometimes i get really sad when i see others having fun with each other.

Don't shut the real people out. One day, a few may surprise you, and become lasting and true friends. Smile And also, don't forget that the on-line scene makes it a lot easier to be the worst sort of person -- that is, to look for those that are 'vulnerable', tell the target what they want to hear, and then carry out their own form of sick-pleasure on them. Remember that your folks are on your side. If you ever consider taking an on-line friend into your real world, I hope you'll bring your folks in on it first.

But I must say again... I've been lucky. And it was through on-line people that I found a will to be 'social'. They grew to respect me for what they saw on-line, and could see none of the visual things that society largely saw as 'deficiencies'. So to those that were true, those things didn't matter when the on-line crossed over into actual reality. Although I suck at the game, I played baseball with a group of those on-liners every week for years. And it branched out into crazy parties, and all that other stuff, if you wanted it. At very least, it made for very fun times.

Today, doing the same is less-likely due to geographical separation and risky on your part. But again, I just wanted to ask that you still give real people a chance. You may make a few like you enough to not care (or even defend you) in the social-norm setting.

(05-12-2016, 07:02 PM)ℱIRE Wrote: It's great to see that people can say this here without being shouted at or something like that. I was never bullied but most of the people I know irl are the most disrespectfull s**t I've seen. I started disliking people, because I thought they all did this: annoying and no respect for others. But since I got on this forums, I've seen different. A GOOD difference.

The good news is that, this general attitude is not permanent. You don't have to be like them! And anyone who shuns such, shows themselves to be a stronger person.

On the flip side, be forgiving too. A lot of those people will turn around almost 180 degrees, and be sorry for who they were in the past.

~Squirrel recalls such a flaw that he fixed in himself~
I had a friend I played ball with 3x a week, 'religiously'. One day he says, "We have to go out and get smashed..." I could tell something was bugging him in a terrible way. Turns out, he was trying to get ME smashed enough so that when I heard what he really had to say, that I'd kill him, and end what he saw as a miserable existence. He described a "life-long fight" against himself, and saw only 3 options (a) continue fighting, even though he couldn't figure out how to; (b) give in to it, which he didn't have the courage to; and © kill himself. The 'huge problem'? He liked guys, not girls. Which was astounding, because we'd both chased the same girl, and she went out with him. All part of his "fight". But rather than carry out his wishes, I told him he should "go for it", and see what happens. My homophobia was almost instantly cured.

(And really, thinking back on it, I was only saying homophobic things, because everyone else was... and I too desperately wanted to fit in, and have some friends/fun.)

I've been overly fortunate, that my desire to 'have friends' made me only too eager to have friends who had some issues, and more fortunate still, that they took me in as a friend and shared. In looking back, I learned so much from what happened to them 'the hard way'.

If we had a "Life, the Universe and Everything" forum, this "introduction" would belong smack-dab in the middle of it!
Fight the Good Fight
(Listen with lyrics here!)
Make it worth the price we pay!
All your life you've been waiting for your chance,
Pray you'll fit into the Plan.
But you're the master of your own destiny,
So give and take the best that you can!
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#10
Welcome to the great Community of Forums
FOR MOTHER RUSSIA!
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#11
@Squirrel I'm trying. I have 1 friend. I know him since i was born. My parents are friends of his parents. I'm happy that i know him. But when i was going to the high school, we started seeing eachother less. We didn't go to the same school. I see him once a week. Thats enough for me. I don't really mind it that i dont have a lot of friends.

But sometimes i feel really depressed. Especially when i'm home alone. Then it's so quiet.. Then i think: Why do i live? Where do i live for? Wich people should really cry if i'm dead? It are all questions, that a normal child doesn't think about. They make fun most of the time. My aunt is lonely too. She's always with her parents(my grandparents), yes she has an house, she only sleeps there. Sometimes my family worries about her, what will she do with her life, when my grandparents are dead?

And so many other problems, they make me depressed.
Tired of living.
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#12
Stay strong and welcum to the community Ke--HazR (sodaC)
Your suicidal hypocritical friendo,
~Falysidia

[Image: 7NDzTFM.gif]
[Image: b2a073bb68b342c399e633f4cc30104c.png]
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#13
(05-13-2016, 01:44 PM)V1tal Wrote: @Squirrel I'm trying. I have 1 friend. I know him since i was born. My parents are friends of his parents. I'm happy that i know him. But when i was going to the high school, we started seeing eachother less. We didn't go to the same school. I see him once a week. Thats enough for me. I don't really mind it that i dont have a lot of friends.

But sometimes i feel really depressed. Especially when i'm home alone. Then it's so quiet.. Then i think: Why do i live? Where do i live for? Wich people should really cry if i'm dead? It are all questions, that a normal child doesn't think about. They make fun most of the time. My aunt is lonely too. She's always with her parents(my grandparents), yes she has an house, she only sleeps there. Sometimes my family worries about her, what will she do with her life, when my grandparents are dead?

And so many other problems, they make me depressed.

I'm out of my depth, when it comes to depression. I've been there, but not the way you have. I'm hoping it's just a particularly bad time for you, but something is also suggesting that it sounds like something you've been dealing with for a long time.

I can relate what I know (or think I know):
- There's multiple types of depression; at least one ('clinical') is caused by physical factors. There may be others caused by hormonal imbalances and such. For those, you can get real help.
- Many more are psychological, and those are tougher, but there are people who can help.. sometimes.
- Depression is virtually impossible to get out of, by yourself. It's like a snowball that starts at the top of the mountain... becoming (especially within your mind) more of an avalanche.
- Friends can help... they won't be able to necessarily fix it, but they can make 'the moment' better. Then you need to just live "for the next moment", or maybe look for a cause that drives you.
- I also wonder about your circumstances, but they should not be discussed openly in public, not with strangers (and who could be stranger than me?), and I don't know what resources are available to you. But maybe we can find someone?

This too, I know. Life is worth living. There is so much to discover and learn. Much, we can do on our own. Many more, it's fun to discover with others. We can often learn more about our own troubles from others who have similar problems.

Messages like yours makes me bite my lip hard, and wish I was more than a mere rodent.
Fight the Good Fight
(Listen with lyrics here!)
Make it worth the price we pay!
All your life you've been waiting for your chance,
Pray you'll fit into the Plan.
But you're the master of your own destiny,
So give and take the best that you can!
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#14
(05-13-2016, 03:43 PM)Squirrel Wrote:
(05-13-2016, 01:44 PM)V1tal Wrote: @Squirrel I'm trying. I have 1 friend. I know him since i was born. My parents are friends of his parents. I'm happy that i know him. But when i was going to the high school, we started seeing eachother less. We didn't go to the same school. I see him once a week. Thats enough for me. I don't really mind it that i dont have a lot of friends.

But sometimes i feel really depressed. Especially when i'm home alone. Then it's so quiet.. Then i think: Why do i live? Where do i live for? Wich people should really cry if i'm dead? It are all questions, that a normal child doesn't think about. They make fun most of the time. My aunt is lonely too. She's always with her parents(my grandparents), yes she has an house, she only sleeps there. Sometimes my family worries about her, what will she do with her life, when my grandparents are dead?

And so many other problems, they make me depressed.

I'm out of my depth, when it comes to depression. I've been there, but not the way you have. I'm hoping it's just a particularly bad time for you, but something is also suggesting that it sounds like something you've been dealing with for a long time.

I can relate what I know (or think I know):
- There's multiple types of depression; at least one ('clinical') is caused by physical factors. There may be others caused by hormonal imbalances and such. For those, you can get real help.
- Many more are psychological, and those are tougher, but there are people who can help.. sometimes.
- Depression is virtually impossible to get out of, by yourself. It's like a snowball that starts at the top of the mountain... becoming (especially within your mind) more of an avalanche.
- Friends can help... they won't be able to necessarily fix it, but they can make 'the moment' better. Then you need to just live "for the next moment", or maybe look for a cause that drives you.
- I also wonder about your circumstances, but they should not be discussed openly in public, not with strangers (and who could be stranger than me?), and I don't know what resources are available to you. But maybe we can find someone?

This too, I know. Life is worth living. There is so much to discover and learn. Much, we can do on our own. Many more, it's fun to discover with others. We can often learn more about our own troubles from others who have similar problems.

Messages like yours makes me bite my lip hard, and wish I was more than a mere rodent.
It are many many problems, combined with eachother they form a depression for me. My aunt who is extremely lonely and depressed. My nefu died when i was 11, he had an accident with his scooter, 6 months in critical state in hospital, died later.
Other nefu got an meningitis at the age of 2. He's deaf now. But it's getting better for me the last months. Still trying to stay strong. 

But ehh actually i wanna change subject..

(05-13-2016, 03:39 PM)Falysidia Wrote: Stay strong and welcum to the community Ke--HazR (sodaC)

Hey i see ur new to the forums. Welcome anyways.

But ehh i think your signature is really annoying. Typical 'screams' are forbidden. But this is a flashy signature. Maybe ask the staff if it is allowed. (I don't know if it is)
Tired of living.
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#15
This is so saddening to see what you have been through! Worse than April, the girl abused by Toby Turner!

Well done on putting up with this and keep on going!
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